I recall, with no great fondness, going back to working two days a week from home when Small Z was three months old. I had been so oblivious to the demands of a new baby that I had blithely informed my workplace:
a) that my mum would mind the baby, because of COURSE there would be no issue with the baby having a bottle
b) that, alternatively, I could work from home – getting everything done while the baby slept, naturally.

Both of these aims were rudely shot down in flames by a baby that would not have a bottle or sleep for more than 40 minutes at a time. So, you can imagine how little I have been looking forward to getting back to work with a three-year-old existing on broken nights and no naps, and a four month old who generally sticks to the will-not-have-a-bottle and 40-minute-napping rules established by her sister.

I don’t know how I am going to do this. Yesterday was a bit of a fluke, as it coincided with (avert your eyes, flooded northern coast of NSW readers) her latest immunisations. Besides the awfulness of having my baby stuck with two needles, simultaneously in both legs and her crying and me crying… later in the day she slept for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. In which time I completed a whole report.

She then slept for five and a half hours straight in the night. Imagine what she could do if I gave her Phenergan (which is what my mother keeps suggesting I give Small Z, but that’s another story). Today she woke with a fever and I had one of those wonderful (not) days where I wanted to wrap her in cotton wool and feed her to sleep and generally love her to bits without interruption (mum was looking after Small Z) instead of which I had my work sitting on the back of my head – so I was keen for her to go to sleep, and a bit frustrated when she wouldn’t.

In the end I managed to dictate about five paragraphs. That’s it. My only hope is that I will manage to train my dication program to the point where I can use it while having her in the sling? Because obviously there is only so long a four month old will be happy to lie on her back and coo at toys… I don’t know how I am going to do it – which my office manager is obviously attuned to, as I’ve only got four files to get done before the end of the month. But the workload will increase next month to two solid days a week (or so she’s promised), and again – I don’t know how I’ll do it. Small Z’s daycare has not worked out, which complicates things further. Where’s the word I’m after? Oh, that’s it. GAHHHHHHHHHHHH!