We set off this morning to Burrum Heads, hired a boat, and were motoring off into the blue yonder by about 11:15am. Chris had been desperate to get on the water at some point during her ‘holiday week’ and when we finally admitted to ourselves that Oomoo simply wouldn’t be ready in time, hiring a boat was the only remaining option (besides borrowing M’s brother-in-law’s leaky tinny – which I refused to do). We settled down to some serious fishing, with concentration borne of the knowledge that it was Chris’s last big chance to show her fish prowess. It was unfortunate that I neglected my hostly attempts at being considerate and landed a mo-fo bream with amazing drama and astounding finesse. I hadn’t had any bites prior to this, and so was somewhat mentally underprepared.
Something big and whalelike bites my line.
B: A whale! A whale! I’ve got a WHALE!
Chris: Oooh. Look at her rod! It must be a whale [with dawning hope] …or maybe a crocodile…
M: It looks big! It looks big!
B: It is big. It’s a MO-FO!
[Shrieks repeatedly, thus alerting all other fish in the perimeter that they were under potential threat. They leave.] M: [turning into penis -powered fishing fuhrer] DON’T BREAK THE LINE! DON’T BREAK THE LINE!
B: Shut up M. SHUT UP. How do I ‘not break the line’? The whale is going to break the line, not me. Be QUIET.
Chris: [giggles, and looks wistfully at my line that is bending in a ‘U’ shape toward the sea.] M: [is momentarily cowed] Just concentrate on the fish…
Chris: Go Bith! Pull it in! Pull it in!
I pull in a Very. Large. Bream.
We all cheer. In our innocence, we do not know that this is to be the solitary fish du jour. During the next four hours I;
1) Pull down the boat awning so it collapses on to Chris’s head,
2) Cast over enthusiastically, cutting Chris’s fishing line in half with my backswing, sending her sinker and her baited hook gracefully to the bottom of the sea,
3) Mishear M warning us that he’s about to do his cowboy style hand-reel cast; I thought he said “Look out for your heads and wallets,” and get his line wrapped around my Jarvis Walker FishHunter Series II. He insists he said “…heads and rods.”
But anyway – we had our first swim of the season and made it home in one piece – even my monster fish…I let him go.