It is a lovely day to stay inside…at home that is. Being inside at work it could be any kind of bloody day and I wouldn’t know the difference. It’s wet. It reminds me of that piece of meteorological crumpet Donal MacIntyre – last Wednesday on the ABC his weather show dealt with rain. Of course, this means Donal must be glistening with precipitation throughout. He’s such a multi-faceted bloke – scuba diving under ice, hang gliding into the middle of a cloud; we were watching him do some insane kayaking;

M: Thats not him.
B: (bouncing in her seat) Yes, yes it is! Go Donal!
M: (rolls eyes) It’s a stunt kayaker.
B: No it isn’t. Look, look! *swoon*
M: Humph

I later discover that the crumpet’s brother is an Olympic kayaker and was standing just off camera ready to jump into action when his sibling took one too many rapids to the head. Which leads me to my own kayaking memory….

Went kayaking for the first time at Warrandyte – up until then I had only ever been canoeing. That got boring and nu cat vitamins
I was ready to go it alone. In circles. For hours. I discovered that successfully steering a kayak was an anathema to my brain. M was very solicitous, looking after me, being screamed at (as I rotated about him). Slowly, I started to get the hang of it. We were three quarters of the way down the river and there had been a few rapids when we reached one that had a whole group of people milling around it, falling in etc.

M, brave and true, left my side for the first time that day and helped rescue someone's canoe. Instantly I flipped 180 degrees and proceeded at speed down the rapid. Oh. What a time was had! I arrived at the bottom of the rapid, still upside-down and with eyes tightly shut, due to presence of contact lenses. M hasn't noticed - he was still being helpful elsewhere.

I vacated the flooded satanic beast. Emptied the water. Entertained vast numbers of people with my contortions whilst trying to re-embark. Then M paddled over, noticed my dripping state and asks if I got splashed. I did the only thing I could - I circumnavigated him furiously.